Threadbare 6s limp towards finish line......
Dom Rowles, 9 March 2010 15:16
After the crushing victory over rivals
Actonians, under the nervous stewardship of Herr Rushden, the
brutal despotic management team of Rowles and Gaudin returned
for the pilgrimage to West Wickham to play bottom of the
table WW5s. Captain Rowles, hearing dubious and self
interested reports by Rushden was convinced to play a team
that contained 3 strikers, though one of them, Kelly was
expected to play the exhausting wing back role. Rowles sporting a fabulous
suntan controversially returned straight into the starting
XI, though Gaudin wasn’t so lucky.
At least that was the plan. Kelly
arrived followed by a strong whiff of sweaty vodka and gin,
and Tavares and Perkins didn’t arrive at all. The glamour
boys of the team had driven straight into a Crystal Palace
council estate a la Bonfire of the Vanities, with Tav as the
rich trader Sherman, and Perks as his glamorous bit on the
side Maria.
Team rejigged, Poly lined up against a
competent opposition which contained the same bespectacled
imp that terrorised us in the home fixture, now supplemented
with a substantial striking side kick who looked like he
could play at a decent level. Poly began combative, but
somewhat uninspired, winning all of the aerial balls but
rarely moving the ball away from a bunch of players somewhere
near the sideline. Most players on the large pitch dispatched
the ball earlier than was required resulting in few moves
worthy of note.
20 minutes in however, Poly scored
from a Kelly corner with a Gaudin near post flick on, Smith
poking in at the far post unattended. 1-0 and territorially
superior, Poly chances began to mount up. Several breaks
missed a final ball or decent touch to round the keeper.
There was even a collector’s item shot on target from captain
that crashed against the bar. Hours of practicing the goal
celebration still unused. At the back Weeks, Tapper and St
Louis dealt with the speedy and occasional breaks in their
stride, despite the isolated WW strikers were playing very
well.
Then we saw the effects of long term
alcoholic abuse. First Kelly went down, as if shot by the
sniper in the trees and then Saint Louis pulled up. Sherman
and Maria came on with Smith sent to the back of the
class.
The second half was fairly uneventful,
despite a couple of spectacular air kick/catches from Smith
and Sidlo, and an ensuing ‘debate’ about how playing sweeper
is different to playing in midfield. Keane, who ran a lot,
did 2 foul throws, and Craigy didn’t get injured. Tavares
rounded the keeper to make the game safe, Pricey made a cameo
appearance despite still suffering the effects of exploded
ankle.
Man of the match was Gaudin who was a
class apart from his teammates covering every blade of grass.
9 more points required for promotion.
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